She is my drug
the only way to get away
from the evil and crucified nightmares
and all that brings pain and suffering to my heart
she is my painkiller
my only sedative to escape the war
the war inside my mind and heart
is all but a mystery to all who think they know me well
She is my alcohol
my only direction to the path of righteousness
but the hell between myself and mind
is all that I'm encountering
but has it just begun? or has it already started?
i don't know for sure.....but its burning in my brain
making a scar that fuses into my brain cells one by one
making them somewhat nonexistent and not worthy of acceptance
but she, the one that's the keeper of my heart accepts my whole image and loves it to death
never to hurt,ridicule,torture,mutilate,or beat it to the ground deep into the cold saddened soil
but to keep it safe from the dangers of this cruel, sickened, depressing world inside her fragile heart
i don't bleed anymore or get cuts from people's hateful words or bruises from people's painful insults and stabbing remarks because she blocks them with a barrier that can't be breeched
she is my poison
my only option to fly away
from anything negative or morbidly disgusting or horrid
i just close my eyes and imagine she's there even though she's sometimes not there physically but she's there spiritually and that's enough to satisfy my mind,body,heart,and soul
and to reassure my sick, black,vampire heart that needs the purification of her angelic touch
she's my drug,painkiller,alcohol,and poison....
