My Past

"Almost everybody already met their turning point
Where insanity and numbness harshly joins
This is me and the creation of my history"

Each time I close my eyes
I'm still hunted by my past life
Disgust is what I feel inside
If only I could turn back the time

Even though years had passed
I still want to erase my past
But this stain I have cannot be washed away
Forever I know it will stay

I've tried many ways to cleanse my soul
Purified it with my faith as I recall
But it was no use, past still lingers
Still being hunted by my nightmares

Many times I've decided to put everything to an end
For the pain I have, time cannot even help me mend
To the cross I have kneeled and beseeched
Even Begged for Him to take me

I've done many ways
I even bet my life to devil's game
I wrote graffiti from my arms to my wrists
Kissed the poison till my eyes produces mists

But it was no use for I still have it in me
My lonely past and its shameful memories
I know someday I will do it again
Betray my life just to be back in heaven