Sometimes I wish,
That I would simply fade off the face off the earth,
Never to be seen again.
Sometimes I feel so invisible,
And knowing that I actually exist,
Whilst no one else notices,
Brings wet tears to my eyes.
Sometimes,
Despite everyone who is there for me,
I am so alone,
So isolated,
So cold.
Sometimes I wish,
For a shoulder to cry on,
A hand to hold,
For a simple hug.
I wish for someone to care,
Not just say they care,
But to care and be there.
Sometimes I am so very disappointed,
To wake up,
In the morning,
To find that I am still alive,
And to see that the nightmares from the night before,
Did not take me,
To their Hell
Sometimes it hurts,
To see the hate in your eyes.
Only sometimes?
It’s true.
I lie.
Sometimes I am the only one who cares,
But then,
To my despair,
I realize,
That I am the one I fear.
Sometimes I like,
The taste of my warm blood,
As I chew on my lip,
Till its swollen and sore.
And I can feel the trickles of blood drip
Sometimes my thoughts,
Are so hard to word,
Perhaps this is all just in my head?
Or perhaps everything I say, is totally absurd
Sometimes i wish,
That i could muster a smile,
Without feeling,
Like i am living a lie.
I wish i no longer,
Wished to die.
-sarah [star]
7th December 2006
{[ this isn't really a poem. nor is it any good. i just need somewhere to place some thoughts, so just ignore me i guess. much love X ]}
