Honest Lies

I swear to God I\'m okay-
(I really just want to die)
Yes this smile is genuine-
(I just want to break down and cry.)
Dont you worry about me-
(Please dont leave my side)
Go ahead, I\'ll see you later-
(I dont want to be left behind)
Nothings wrong stop asking-
(Is my pain so hard to see?)
I swear I am happy,
(I cant believe you believe me.)
I dont miss my mom at all-
(I cant get her off my mind)
I dont know why she wont write-
(Its because I was selfish and unkind.)
Why would I hate you?
( I envy you with all of my heart)
Why would I be mad at you?
(maybe because you lied from the start.)
No i\'m not crying-
(I wish I could tell,)
Life really isnt that bad-
(damn it- life is hell.)
I\'m not a violent person
(you deserve to be dead,)
No I\'m not phycotic-
(I hate taking all these meds.)
I swear all this is honest-
(I promise you thats a lie-)
I am just going in to sleep-
(Actually I am going in to cry.)
I promise you I am okay-
(I\'ve been doing this since my youth)
I promise you I am not sad
(I hope you can see the truth.)