Comments : Depression

  • 17 years ago

    by Darien

    Good poem, I know there is a language barrier between us, and your have your own dialect. It made sense to me, because I have a lot of Filipino friends and I know how they speak. Lol, nice work.

  • 17 years ago

    by Jenni

    I really liked this. even though it was short, I could feel a lot of emotion behind it. The only think though, I think that you meant to say "heart is broken in two too many times" instead of "Heart is broken into many times,"

    other than that, this was lovely.

  • 17 years ago

    by Bryan

    Great poem, make the 3rd line (Heart has been broken so many times), but its still very good!!!

  • 17 years ago

    by Italian Stallion

    Great start, It was a bit short, so I thought I should be a bit longer.

    The first line, "I may look seem so happy," Should be, "I may look or seem so happy,"

    And the last line, "And i feel i can no longer to live anymore..." Should be, "And i feel i can no longer live anymore..."

    Other than that I thought the flow was great. Keep up the good work.

    Peace, Joe

  • 17 years ago

    by TracyM

    Really short, but i liked it,

  • 17 years ago

    by Melpomene

    I liked this poem i found it short but it held enough information throughout it to keep me interested and show what you were portraying throughout this. The flow was nicely done. Great read. ~mel

  • 17 years ago

    by Vanessa

    Short and to the point. Only problem with this poem is the first line. You should chose either look, or seem, not both in this case. It leaves the flow appering, a bit rocky. Other than that well written. 4/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Soft Parade

    Id have liked the poem to go on but it soped leaving me in the mood of the poem, well done, nicely executed

  • 17 years ago

    by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

    I don't know why, maybe it's that I like you, but I actually kind of liked this overly cliche poem. Not sure.

    But, it was cliche and I hate cliche and it just didn't do anything for me..I'm sorry.

    xTheEcstasyofSuicidex 4.5

  • 17 years ago

    by Nix

    Great piece! It is short but very powerful. I like the topic and you wrote this poem excellently. I like every line in this poem, it really deserves 5/5

  • I CAN RELATE TO IT. I like the form of this poem, it is short but powerful. It is also deep and emotional.

  • 17 years ago

    by lish

    This is a short but effective poem, it definately expresses your feeling well
    5/5 well done
    xx

  • 17 years ago

    by Shinobi

    I know this feeling so well. There are times in which I see my life empty and meaningless. The poem is short but gives a strong message. Nice work 5/5

  • I like this, it's short and simple, and it still holds a lot of emotion. I loved it!

    .:CiNdY:.

  • 16 years ago

    by EssenceOfLace

    I know how that feels. although there are a few words that are unneeded.
    this is what your poem looks like

    "I may look seem so happy,
    But I'm crying inside
    Heart is broken so many times,
    Tears streaming from my swollen eyes
    There are times i think to give up,
    And i feel i can no longer to live anymore..."

    it should be, to correct your grammar mistakes
    "I may seem so happy,
    But I'm crying inside
    My heart has been broken so many times,
    Tears streaming from my swollen eyes
    There are times i think to give up,
    And i feel i can no longer live anymore..."

    it sounds and looks way better like that. just my thoughts. but i totally understand the concept of the poem.
    5/5