It is done. It is finally over, and she didn't come back.
I am the only one left. Everything that was so sure to me before is now lost.
She didn't come back.
I have measured my whole life by this one day, all my choices of my past made because of this day.
But she didn't come back.
A shadow taught me love only to be lost in darkness and now it is I who is cloaked in it.
There is a foul reek upon the air.
There is no freedom for I. I am alone. No one is left.
They all lie around me, so still and silent do they lie that I wonder if their lives were but a figment of my imagination for I cannot truly believe they're all gone, just like that.
It is done. He shall never return. I have left him to the earth and hhe shall never be raised from the ashes.
It is all one nightmare. I am its creator as well as its demolisher, bringing down my dreams.
She didn't come back.
I have placed such faith in her survival that it led me here today to find her after twenty long years of regret but she did not come back.
I lay now with my back to an old oak, one of the few not fallen, and I wonder what lies ahead. For twenty years I believed it would truly end on this day and that I should be granted another chance, another life, a life to really live.
I have served so long that I remember not a time when I did not.
I had believed she would be here, to heal me of the past that grips my soul, set to haunt me to the end of my days.
Now I cannot help but fear that today is the day that I shall give in, to the world, to life, to myself.
All I have ever hoped, dared to believe in has fallen through.
And I am left, alone, just me, just nothing.
I wish she were to walk behind me, hold me, tell me she shall never leave me, but I know I do not deserve such redemption. I have cast myself too many sins, too many crimes yet to pay for.
I accept that this is the fate I am dealt, to deal with.
It is done.
She did not come back.
**I don't really think this is similar to any of my other writing. I felt the need to write this, the words came. I am actually surprised at how this came out. It was not my intention to have this piece written but I am pleased with it. It shows a different side of my writing, especially as, from my own emotion within it, it is written from the eyes of another person. A bizarre piece of my imagination. On a different note I could not decided between lost relationship, death or grieving, I think it has a darker side to it but i think it the sadness that makes the piece so I went with sadness:-other**
