i knew this would happen. Everyone says the worst thing is to be lonely ? i ask, what about failure ? Or rejection, violation, corruption. Loneliness is nothing to me. i always get left behind.
Everyone grows up and i stay. Trapped in this body i wish to deny. i don't want the attention, for so many frightful things come with it. Responsibility for instance.
i don't want to be desirable. To have hands caress me, touch, feel, press, bite. i don't want any of those things with anyone.
It's all inside. So much and no one GETS THE POINT. No one is listening, perhaps they weren't meant to. May be i am fine, so there is nothing to listen to. That could explain it.
But i am fine, what are these things i feel and see, hear and want to know more about ? Its like i live a different life everyday inside. Trying to please them, to amuse him.
i don't want him, i WANT HIM, she shows the way, while White Rabbit holds my hand. They get the point.
So there must be one, if inside, i am not alone in this. Outside, in the world, i have always been alone, no one has the time.