Well this certainly is an interesting piece. What I felt about it is that it lacked emotion. Your feelings didn't leap at me. Although you can see you have a knack for writing, make sure it comes from your heart...it interests your reader more. You have good comparisons, and a good idea for structure, its unique. Alot of thought went into this poem, just not enough emotion.. use both and you will be an awesome poet!!

Godbless
Sammib

Wow X) this poem is REALLY good. I like how you used a bird referring to love. Keep writing ;) excellent poem.