Only (foolish) Child

So now I know what it's come to
when you nod and don't even smile.
I know my efforts are in vain,
Two acceptances to college are not worthwhile.

So happy and excited,
I come running up to you.
You nod as you stand and mutter "that's good",
and my happiness goes askew.

I realize now that I haven't been forgiven,
for what happened in the recent past.
You barely acknowledge the accomplishment as I stand, stunned by your silent blast.

Mom gets home and she gives me hug,
her smile is easy to see.
I feel loved again and at least I know
that she is proud of me.

She asks if I told you, I tell her I did.
Again by your response I'm haunted.
You look at mom and say
"Yes, that's good. Guess she got what she wanted."

You look at me from across the room,
anger and disgust shows in your eyes.
I fix you with a hurt glare of my own,
trying not to let you see me cry.

I don't know how long it will take,
but you're making my pain run wild.
I know you'll never look at me the same again.
I'm now your only (foolish) child.

I try to remind myself that you care,
I hope it won't always feel like war.
I'll always LOVE you because you're my dad,
but right now, I don't LIKE you anymore.