My Ancestors watch in shame

My Ancestors watch in shame
As I waste away
I have failed at everything good that has come my way
My tears run straight
My heart breaks
I lost the love of my life
And somehow I am support to survivor
What a joke
My hate and rage knows
I lost more then a girl
I lost my hope
My dreams
My belief in everything good
I sit in anger and sadness
With the knowledge my life will soon end
The pain hurts, like someone slowly slicing my skin off inch my inch

How can I live without her and not go insane
How do I go on when everything in my life has stopped?
I sit in the dark
I hide out
In this world I am out of place
No happiness, no feeling
I just miss her
I am such I joke