Sorry

I sit awake on my bed,
Tears streaming down my face,
Tonights that awaited night...
Tonights my final trace.

Or so thats the plan,
The tablets on my table,
I thought this would be so much quicker,
Than the sacred noose-like cable...

Ten small pills,
Down my tightened throat,
Didnt bother to leave you,
That last final note.

You wouldnt read it,
You dont care,
No one does,
And that I am sure

Ten more tablets,
Go down my air hole,
Drowning away my life,
Killing my pathetic soul.

Five more tablets,
The deadly ones that kill,
I blink away my second thoughts,
Wash them down with skill.

A few moments later,
Everything gets dark,
Dizzy, Im out of sink
I black out...

Seconds later,
My eyes are open,
But not for long,
Flickering open and shut,
My mind is dying.

Terrible pains,
Instant sleep,
Constant headaches,
Heart skips the beats

I open my eyes,
So tired,
No energy,
Pain.

Why am I still here,
Im not meant to be...
Ill make sure next time is different,
I promise, Youll see.