Welcome to My Life.

I live my life moment by moment. All my energy and effort is fully devoted to getting myself through. Through each second, each day, each dream after terrible dream. All my strength is used to keep myself away from drugs, and drinking away the pain. All my focus spent on avoiding cutting, keeping my mind distracted from the seductive and addicting knife. Yet everyone around me, can\\\'t see this. And instead of being happy that I\\\'m still alive, or proud that I haven\\\'t turned to short term reliefs...they get mad. They get mad if I miss a chore, or if I don\\\'t do my best in school or towards people to make the best impression, so I don\\\'t embarrass them. No one can see, Nor care, about the \\\"progress\\\" I\\\'ve made. Look at my wrists, give me a drug test...I am doing my best, and just cause it doesn\\\'t show in the way you want it to doesn\\\'t mean it\\\'s not there. But you don\\\'t care, because I\\\'m never going to be good enough.
...so here I am, hanging from a thread, barely able to make it through a day, and nobody cares, nobody can see how much it takes and has taken just to still be hanging on that thread; but they can criticize how I got there and find someway to make it my fault. Thank you.