Darling, When You Stand In The Moonlight {Terzanelle}

by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex   Dec 23, 2006


I like the repetition of 'Darling' in the piece. If you do not, do not downrate for such a small imperfection.
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Darling, when you stand in the moonlight,
The venom glittering on your fangs, I can see.
Darling, when you stand in the moonlight,
Your shining face is with one I must agree.
Darling, with that beautiful, luminous stare,
The venom glittering on your fangs, I can see
With your loving heart caressing me with care.
My love, with your thoughtful, precious eyes,
Darling, with that beautiful, luminous stare,
Caress me with your careful lies.
Darling, when you dance in the moonlight,
My love, with your thoughtful, precious eyes,
Your such a wonderful, glorious sight.
The venom on your glittering fangs, I can see
Darling, when you dance in the moonlight,
Your eyes shine in the light of pure ecstasy.
Darling, when you stand in the moonlight,
The venom on your glittering fangs, I can see
Darling, when you stand in the moonlight.

````````````````````````````````

1. A
2. B
3. A

4. b
5. C
6. B

7. c
8. D
9. C

10. d
11. E
12. D

13. e
14. F
15. E

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by Tricky Daze

    Really interesting type and a good subject,well done

  • 17 years ago

    by donk2ymouth

    It's an interesting poem. I don't know about Terzanelles, so I don't know if you have to keep on repeating a certain line, or slightly change a slightly line and whatever. Anyway, the repeating of that one line/slightly changing and repeating had a tremendous effect on me, it changed the whole poem. I went back and read it again without the sentences that keep on repeating, and to be honest, I had no interest in this piece at all. The repetition makes the poem. Keep up the good work.

  • 17 years ago

    by .K.i.T.t.Y.

    Wow. mmm i'm like picturing the scene. and i love it. its kinda creepy, but awesome!!!

  • 17 years ago

    by deadbeatromance

    I absolutely love it.
    -deadbeatromance

  • 17 years ago

    by Tainted Beauty

    "Your eyes shine in the light of pure ecstasy." I absolutetly loved this line, it was beautiful.

    I really liked this poem, but i found it a bit hard to follow, maybe it's just because i don't fancy the form you wrote it in. But i must say, your choice of words and rhymes were beautiful, and it really painted a dark and very clear image of what you were trying to describe. Great work.

    --Steph

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