It's christmass evening,
i celebrate it with family but i'm still alone. all those things i feel, no-one have ever known.
I'm stuck in a cricle, don't know where to go. All those feelings that i don't want to show.
everything i had is gone.. so many things where it went wrong.
i had to tell my stephdad goodbye.
the broken relation between my mother and him, no there was no ''one more try''
7 years he was my dad.
the best dad i've ever had.
buttt.. i had fights at home,
it wasn't normal,the police had to come. i was so wrong.
my deads and stuff, but then..
i felt in love.
i was so happy with him.
i forget all about my problems and sorrows. i believed in tomorrows.
when i left,i smiled to unknown people because i was so happy.
they saw a reale smile up on me.
he healed my heart,i dared to trust.
but then i realised,this isn't a fairytail,this isn't the love boat sea where i can sail.
i live in reality,all those things where i dreamed of, how it used to be..
fade away,all those spoken words i still wanted to say..
why everything went that way.
everything felt down,everything i had is lost..
my luck is gone,my stephdad and his family are gone..
WILL I EVER DARE TO TRUST AGAIN?
