Meant to Be?..... Or Not?

Deep inside I hurt with pain
Caused by you forever to reign.

It started off slow, it started to bend.
As days went by we soon later became friends.

Night and day we'd talk and talk
Just you and me there in the dark.

I knew you and you knew me
After everything we've shared we've given our autobiographies.

I'd talk to you almost everyday
Making me feel good how you made the pain go away.

I helped you and you helped me
How close we became in only a matter of weeks.

We got closer and closer the more that we shared.
Until one day we decided to tell how much we cared.

I had feelings for you, you had feeling for me.
We let them show letting our emotions free.

We decided to meet one day after school
To show how we were feeling, forgetting about the rule.

We hugged and kissed wanting time to stop.
But once was great slowly began to drop.

What I felt was special, it seemed a bit surreal.
The feelings that I felt I never thought I could feel.

I wanted to be just you and me
But it felt impossible for it to just be.

You went out with my friend now broken up and done.
But there's just one problem, you still hang on to your love.

It became weird, we didn't speak.
I felt used and hurt and you didn't even see.

You texted me I texted back, we finally got things straight.
We decided to just stay friends, things would be better that way.

So we stayed friends, our bond even stronger.
I helped you solve most of your problems with her.

Then came a day when I heard some news.
You two might get back and I was happy for you.

You told me everything and you seemed confused.
I asked you why and you said, "It's because of you."

You told me more and I found out some things.
After everything that's happened, you still had feelings for me.

I had to admit that I did too.
Just when I thought I was done all the feelings came back for you.

But you two still might get back and I know you're confused.
But just to let you know I'm always gonna be here for you.

You can talk to me about anything you want.
I'll set my feelings aside for something that is not.

All I want is to see you happy.
It's gonna hurt but I just gotta breathe.

Breathe in the good, breathe out the bad.
How can I miss what I never had?

All my friends say I should stop talking to you.
They don't want me to hurt again and be down in the blue.

But you're my friend and I said I'll always be here.
Through everything there is even through what I fear.

My feelings for you are strong and I don't know if they'll ever go away.
Having you in my life just makes my day.

You say one day maybe we can be.
But until that day I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

- Stefanie, 2005