HAY... well i think its kul.. im not very good at writing poetry so its lyk gr8 haha... I think you cud turn dat into a song... nd it does make sense :D keep writin!
luv ya!!

I think it makes perfect sense. It was a little cliche (*that* may not make sense) in that repeated verse,

{She lays, covered in lace
Her cold lifeless hands
Clutch a blood stained rose}

Because I've heard really similiar stuff before, and there didn't seem to be anything original about it.

I like the genre, and think that if you could find a new edge to this idea and work off that, it would be really good.

P.S. - please don't hate me! I hope you are open to constructive criticism, and realize I mean it only in good taste. I love your style, and I don't mean anything against your writing.

~Amber

This was a real good piece. Sad. I really am glad i read this poem. You have a very good talent. Hope to read more of your writing.

This is such a surreal poem. The flow of words are amazing...
Thanx for the comments.. you're such a talented poet... :)

Once again you write something that is totally opposite of your personality but thats okay. lol Its good. ^_^

//Khrystyne\\