Red Pen

If I were to write my suicide note,
I'd use a red pen.
To show you my heart,
to show you my blood.

It was my heart that always ached
as you dropped a thousand words
like bricks on my soul
and you didn't notice.

And you didn't care
that my blood always flowed
and down the waterfall
crashing down below.

And it's loud, it's loud,
the bottom of the waterfall
the equivalence of my life.
Red water, red wine,

with a bunch of little pills.
I want to sleep in the puddle
so shallow and I can't swim,
and I can't see.

The waterfall is plugged
and I'm no longer flowing.
And it all dried up
and I all dried up.

Left on the floor in blood
I just want
Nothing more
Let me sleep.

The wine's sweet
but the pills are so mad they're screaming,
and they pound inside of me
and you pound inside of me.

I broke, you hit too hard
and the red wall
can't stop me anymore
because I'll never be red.

I'll never be you
but I am, so I'm stuck
drowning in my puddle.
Salty tears.

Crimson blood who hates me too.
I do it a favor,
release the birds from their cage
and you still hate me

and you still don't care.
That you made the waterfall.
I am red and it's my fault.
I am dead and it's my fault.

But that's the outside,
You get credit for the in.
Thank the red wine and pills
and bury me in the red wall.

But you already did.
So I don't need to write my suicide note,
because I've already died
in my red pen.

To show you my heart.
To show you my blood.