And suddenly

Everything seems to be okay.

Today was a good day.
The best I have had in months.
I really needed it.

But you know what the funny thing is?
The only thing I did today was write an essay.
I did not hang out with anyone, except for about twenty minutes with Joseph.
Hmm, you know someone really does care about you when they are willing to drive 25 minutes each way to and from your house, just to be with you for a few brief minutes.
You have absolutely no idea how much that really means to me.

It\\\'s so funny how much we take for granted.

Today I realized that I do have love.
I have friends that actually do care.
And that means a lot.
Right now, I feel great.
I don\\\'t think I have been this happy in quite awhile.
Months, maybe even years.

I\\\'m so sorry to those who I have taken for granted. You are so great, and I really do appreciate everything you do.. even if it isn\\\'t for me. And even if it seems like it didn\\\'t phase me.

Even though I have had so much shit happen lately, it all seems to be okay now. It\\\'s crazy how much you appreciate when you have been traumatized.

Perhaps everyone should have a little trauma in their life, so they can be thankful for their life.

I know I am.

Thanks for reading this whole thing.
These past few days have been life changing for me.
In a horrible sense, it has helped me.

And I want to say thank you for all of those who have hurt me so badly. If it wasn\\\'t for you, I would be common knowledge. I would be the same as everyone in the world. Upset because they don\\\'t live in the biggest house. Upset because they are not popular. Upset because they don\\\'t have any big plans for every weekend.

Well, as I sit here on new years, completely alone, no one home, I can\\\'t be any happier. I think everyone needs to see this side of life once in awhile. It is so foreign, so uncomfortable. So not me. But yet it is so perfect.

It is just so amazing.