He's my best friend
He's my best pal
We'll be fightin terror till the end
Throughout this war and all
He saved my life back in school days
We been tight like the rope that life is
He convinced my boss to give me a raise
He helped me get a date with mah miss.
But you'd be surprised at the identity
Many people would say our friendship is a sham
Just because my best friend is me
Doesn't mean you can hate, no ma'am.
Through thick and thin
I stayed for me
I avoided the gin
And remained death-free
My inspiration from my hero
It isn't impossible, no sir
But just before you go
Don't call me a bigot, it just isn't fair.
For I like me more than you like others
My friendship aids me in making friends
Your self hatred, well, it's the others it smothers
All your relationships have rocky ends.
