This feeling...

This feeling...a longing for what i cannot reach. its an ache within my heart. plagued with such feeling so overpowering to my mind.

increased is this feeling accompaniment to the thoughts of them, and my standing in their life.
the sadness hand in hand with the heartache playing off of the thoughts that plague my waking consciousness that give me nightmares well into the night

the tears cascade down my face in rhythm with the beating of my heart. a new year has begun yet the memories of the last still at the forefront of my mind. a happy start to the year now just as dismal as last year.

its just another day that is getting the better of me. the isolation, the impending sense of doom, the increasing feeling of loneliness, all contributing to the heartache and new sadness.

i wish it would all go away, this pain the overwhelmed mind the all too intense feelings. is there an end to all of this or does it just go on?

the aching heart the sadness and loneliness do i really miss them so...or is there more to what is going on like these querying thoughts of what i am to them do they to play their part in this state of mind also.