Escaping the Cycle

Another morning I awake defeated
beaten by my own inadequacies
my hopes and ambitions retreated
could you see me there on my knees
praying that last night would not be repeated
felt no winds of change, not even a breeze

just new found serrated edges on my soul
crafted to pierce delicate skin
now I speak without self-control
because of this sadness within
and in an attempt to console
you'll take every word on the chin

torn sutures, on your reopened wounds i prey
because I'm not ready to see them mend
blaming my actions on a "bad day"
yet this behavior is becoming a trend
and if it starts to happen everyday
I'm afraid I'll have no logic left to defend

fate is waiting, but I can't help stalling
I'm just not ready to accept the truth
towards my destiny I'm slowly crawling
I miss smiles,happiness, and my youth
I guess I'll pretend it's childhood calling