A Loud Winter

So much noise, it surrounds me. the sound of the ground and my heart colliding, the thought, subsiding. i can't even put in writing how uselessly exciting , a thought arising to fall, a hole in the wall. it's all you can see.. it isn't me, no not me. indefinitely, I can't stand standing for this anymore. obsessive, compulsive, lying at me. I can only see what's free, and in front of me. problems surrounding, the news astounding - a plane crash, wife beaten and bashed, ten car pile up, a lie that stuck. with me, from he, the one so lovely it threatens me, with such explosive tendencies, i just don't understand. his heart in his hand, in my head, taking it to bed. I never sleep alone, turn off the phone after the seventh ring. screaming and singing. hoping and grinning, a smirk, a smile, just a little while. it's like a song lasting just too long, its fun while it lasts when falling so fast, a ten foot crash, never enjoyed falling as one, or two. who knows? nothing falls as slow as snow.