I found this a little hard to read with the rhythm, but past this I really loved the raw emotion in it, and maybe with a bit of word changing in e.g.verse 4 to make it flow better it can be really, really good. Just my opinion don't mean to offend or anything.. :)

This is wonderful, i love it.
5/5
keep it up
~rAY

Heya, on second reading it actually seems fine and I wouldn't dare intrude and try to reword anything that seems wrong, like the time my art teacher drew on my painting! It's fine, it's great and I love the themes running through it. Don't change it.

I started to tear reading this poem.

This was great! I loved the rhyming. Also, the wording was good too. 5/5

I really really really really love this......it is excellent really.... like it alot...think i'm gonna put it on my favs.
<3
L.C
*comment my work plz*

Wow this poem was just breathtaking I loved every word in it ^^

Noelle

Now see this almost made me cry!

Like alot :)

Like alot :)

Like alot :)