Hey nice imagery. Good poem, although i think the strict rhyming scheme may have constricted the ability to really say what you feel.
But it was great.
And i know how you feel, ive only just started writing myself.
Its a whole different world out here...

Even though your poems aren't perfect yet (they're pretty darn close for someone who just started) you're amazing at writing--especially endings! :)
KH

Hey kayla :) that was pretty good for first go huny!!! The stanzas were very short as were the sylablles per line but yea. that made it flow quicker and made the reader keep reading :)

Nice imagery
its a round about poem, me likes.
you might want to expand a little bit, short lines signify fast reading and a rush, you know? consise is always better then rambling and repeat, but remember you're a writer, you have words at your finger tips. Every word has a connotation and a denotation, (connotation is precived meaning like red = anger or god= wealth.. leering = evil intent, denotation is the dictionary meaning)

Just some things to think about

its great for a first go girlie.
*hugs tight* Keep it up

Every word has a connotation and a denotation, (connotation is precived meaning like red = anger or god= wealth.. leering = evil intent, denotation is the dictionary meaning)

** didnt finish my though wow english homework is melting my brain umm okay so :

remember to choose words carefully because in different contexts they paint different images =]

Much love *hearts*