At least we have a history. The memories at the beginning aren't so hard to deal with. Things fell apart when I met Jon.

I would have loved you.
Either way.
Monster or not.

"So sacrifice yourself and let me have whats left. I know that I can find the fire in your eyes."

I'd set myself ablaze to let you save me, all you had to do was ask..

You know that my heart is in your hands. My soul is in the ocean. There is no Carisa or Jill or PO3 anymore. It's just me. Maybe you ripped off my outer shell and left me with who I really am. Is this me?

I want to save you. More than anything. I want to save us. But we can't be saved. You are a monster and you hold my life in your hands. What do you want to do with it?

"Can you feel it crush you? Does it seem to bring the worst in you out? There's no running away from these things that hold you down. Do they complicate you because they make you feel like this? Of all the colors that you've shined this is surely not your best. But you should know these colors that you're shining are surely not the best colors that you shine. "

The question is.. what is there to do now..
now that i've made you like me..
....
should i stand here, or shall i go,
i dont know which would be the eaiset.. or the best for you..
im here...

You have already killed me. Don't think about me anymore. What do you want? Spell it out. I'm not smart enough to figure it out.

What do you want to do.. do you want me to stay.. will that make things harder.. or should i turn and walk away, i pushed you away.. yet i stayed and all this happend.. so what now, do i leave.. what do you want me do to.. ?

I want you to tell me exactly what you want...no riddles...just tell me.

Do you want me to stand here, as a friend to try to help things, or will that in turn hurt you more.. do you want me to go away.. die in some hole.. or try to gather my thoughts.. and just keep on loving her, cause nothing is going to change that now.. Ive grown attached.. she loves me back,
I know at one time i held your heart in my hand, but now ive screwed that up..
She holds mine in hers, as i do hold hers tightly..
i screwed up.. period.. im not that one, the one who is knightly.. i tried..
i failed..

Thanks for taking my heart and stepping all over it......appreciate it.

You see the point i was trying to make, i was remolding you to succeed.. if i didn't, it would have been worse.

Please don't use me to make yourself feel better.

No, im not using you,
I molded you, f u c k e d up and tryed to make things different.

I am myself. Not something created by a monster.