What a beautifuly written poem. I love the way it tells a story and the message at the end is great! Take Care Cindy

Wow! good flow...very well written... i love it...especially the ending..great job!

REALLY GOOD. I like it alot.... 5/5

Wow. great great great poem! loved the detailing so much! it really painted a picture. wow. 5/5 for sure. keep up the great work:)

"Never give up hope, even in the worst of times,
and always keep trying your hardest.
Because giving up on these things -
is like giving up on yourself. "

I thought the ending stanza was very powerful. The whole poem was very chilling and almost like a horror film but the ending held a strong message to the reader and held a note of hope.
The only thing i can suggest is to try and keep the length of the lines in each stanza consistent so that the rhythm stays the same.
But the poem was brilliant anyway =)5/5
*Gem*

(Comment Two)

Fantastic. Wow this poem was really strong.Like other I too think the end stanza was powerful.
Your detail definitly paints a picture.
Keep it up.
Elaine

Another excellent poem the last stanza is indeed powerful your poem is very detailed and paints a picture that noone else could paint.