Audreys Wedding Day

It's the day of your big white wedding, the look on your face to the church you are heading,
your bridegroom with top hat and tails,
your mother in law acting all hard as nails.

The car you roll up in, rolls royce made for two,
all the gifts you recieve, some borrowed, some blue,
the look in his eyes fixed upon you like glue,
your best mate is late because of the flu.

The bridesmaids are ready with flowers and frills,
the mother in law so anxious she starts popping pills,
the bridegroom is ready waiting for you,
to exit your Rolls Royce made for two.

The best man called to say he'll be late,
and to make matters worse, He's stuck in Kuwait,
The bridegroom starts to panic now and turns to his mother and calls her a cow.

\"Really dear, on your wedding day! swearing and cursing in such a way, it\'s not my fault it\'s all fallen apart, you are speaking to me now, and not your tart!\".

The bridegroom is desperate to get to the pub and asks the vicar to hurry it up,
the vicar can\'t because you havn\'t arrived,
you\'re in that Rolls Royce with tears in your eyes.

You look at your dress and think to yourself \'in ten years time I\'ll be left on the shelf\',
what\'s the point in being unhappy,
F**k all that, I\'ll marry myself!\'

So from there you head off down the aisle,
a few steps seems like a mile,
you get to the end and grab the vicar,
\"I\'m marrying myself, so get me a mirror!\"

You say all your vows and leave it at that,
the bridegroom is lonely so you buy him a cat,
\"Adios Amigos, I'm off back to OZ,
have a nice life in the village of nobs".

Although it wont ever end up like this, happy ever after on a star that I wish!