Where did I go wrong?

I've been her friend for three years, I've kept a secret for three years, I had her for 6 months, and I've lost her for 4.

I've never felt so bad about losing a person the way that I did, I've met alot of people over the years, and lost alot of people over the years, but losing her has made me lose myself and my faith in myself, I had someone it takes everybody years to find, and I've lost her.

I'm surprised that I had her, she was the perfect angel, my own angel, the gardenia in my flower garden, she was always there when I needed her, and I was always there when she needed me, but something happened, and I don't know where she is or who I am......

Where did I go wrong?