Despise the lies

I despise the lies,
That I proceed to tell.
And at my false stories,
I continue to excel.

I know it's a problem,
And I know it's not fair,
But what would you think
If I made you aware?

What would you say,
If you knew about my life?
If you knew my best friend,
Was the blade of a knife?

What would you do,
If you knew about my past?
How I was forced to grow up,
All too fast?

Would you be able to hear,
That it's myself I hate?
Always skipping meals,
To cut down my weight.

What do you think,
Should I tell you the truth
Are you ready to handle
The secrets of my youth?

Would you see me any different?
Would you love me the same?
Or would you put me down,
And fill me with shame?

I hope I can trust you,
And stop all these lies,
Reveal my true self,
And shed this disguise.