To be honest, I wouldn't actually class this as a poem, it doesn't have any particular structure or anything to it. I think that if you wanted to say something short but have a point like you had, you should try a particular style of poem. They are interesting to write and are great for just something small to say. Just a suggestion.

Tammie

I clicked on this because i was thinking about my boyfriend's mother being a hypocrite but this was a really short poem and it was a little off.