Message Hidden in the Cavern Wall

Writing in secrecy
Hidden among candle light
To the demons in control
Of me this dreaded night.

The bloody demons that are
Disturbing my very mental.
That make me ponder
If this damn love is real.

Demons I created myself
That feed my fears. While
I know she wouldn't lie,
I still live in complete denial.

These monsters that come
To me in my dark dreams,
Terrorize my heart and love
To the point when my soul screams!

Leaches that feed on doubt
Slightly caused by a goodbye
With the forgotten "I Love You."
That makes me wish to die.

Devils appear before me now
Out of the smoke I breathe.
And ghosts haunt me of
Your spirit that I cannot see.

My mind is truly tainted,
As the thoughts of the forbidden
Cloud my conscience self
And make the real me hidden

Inside of myself. Its
As I am my own prison.
I fight my own battles
With myself for each decision.

Ice now fills my veins
As my heart freezes over.
Rage controls me now
Though I remain sober.

I see a race of non-existence:
The people of my mind.
Even with them I feel alone
Though they are my kind.

I hear their violent cries
Asking me to come home.
I hesitate to again leave
Though my presence is not know.

My memories I have of her
Bring my back home to hell.
For I miss her oh so
And I wish her to be doing well.

The flames eat away
The flesh that once did
Caress her face. Now just
A memory of very well hid.

Blood pours out the wounds
Of the knives in my back,
Stabbed deep into my spine
By friends of my lost track.

And still the cd skips
Again and again my life repeats.
The same disappointments, yet
New faces as again fate meets

With God and Satan
To decide how next to kill
The fragile fragments of my being
And permanently erase my will.

Fate has become my father,
And misery thus is my mother.
Suicide is my sister. I will not
Succumb to this! For I love her!

Though love doesn't seem strong
Enough to break the barrier
Of the gate to the Great Abyss.
I am just a mere carrier

Of the New World disease
That plagues my spirit.
Do save me! Please speak up.
For I cannot hear it.

Deaf is now the ears
Which I so did treasure.
No longer do I hear
The music that was of her.

A Dragon of such as me
Cannot stand in the presence
Of a Holy being of an Angel.
I did bring her presents

High on eagle's wings.
Back before I was damned
To this eternal darkness,
And my soul was in his hand.

Ever so much do I still long
To just once again hold
In my arms my lover
And not be consumed by the cold

Of eternal loneliness. That
Bitter cold feeling of emptiness
Now fills the void in me
That once held true bliss.

As the grey hairs fall
From my fading body
I'm lost in a nightmare
And cannot find reality.

No longer can I distinguish
What's fake and what's real.
If I even needed help, it's now.
On my own I cannot heal.