Hm.. this is a very differnt poem then what I was expecting. I like the words and ect, the only critism that I have is that I didn't really get a message out of it like I typically do in all of your other stuff, this one just seemed to me like a story of a man that you started with no ending.

You took a good subject to write about! really well said! i think that this poem is sooo true, there are sooo many lies just to get us out of trouble, yet sometimes it does nt work i gues...:P
keep up the great work

This was very creative. I liked the wording. It wasn't my favorite from you.. But it was still really good. Flowed really well & I love this form of poetry :]

Bri x

This was good but I think the ending could have been abit more stronger if you would have used a more imaginative wording but it was good none the less Plot121