I wonder about life everyday and why it has to make love so hard to hold on to.. Its like trying to keep sand in the hourglass but someone keeps tipping it over making my time go out... I fell in love with someone who will never love me back and now I'm torn inside.. everyday i hear his voice and wish he was mine and yet... i don't... i don't want my heart to be broken anymore so why should i let him know how i feel?? why should i tell him when he seems to "know" it already.. then there are the moments that scare me the most: ones where HE seems to feel the same way.. but he always shuts them up quicker than i can and I'm always second-guessing myself on how he feels.. no i won't ask.. not my place.. just like its not his place to ask me.. Everyone seems to know how i feel anyways so why talk... i don't know.. I'm so confused on what to do.. i guess to keep on doing what I've been doing and enjoy what i have with him.. but its so hard to look at that friendship and wish for something so much more.. something I'll never have... Something i haven't felt in return from anyone in a long time..
So i hide my emotions and try not to let them escape from the confinements that i hold them in.. Everyday is another day i have to confront my emotions and deny how i feel.. one day i hope I'll be able to face the person I've become and the actions I've made... hopefully one day in the future I'll be able to come to grips on who I've lost...me included... one day.. maybe... maybe not...
