Looking through and back at me
These eyes of black are all I see
Eyes of black full of despair?
Or unfeeling eyes that just don't care?
Pools of black that seem so deep
To hide all of the thoughts I keep
Thoughts of hate and things not to tender
To thoughts of love, hope and sweet surrender
Eyes of black I keep calm and still
Through sheer force and strength of will
I cannot risk a breaking dam
And unleashing all of who I am
I'm just scared to let you see
That deeper darker side of me
For can you truly accept?
The dark side that I protect?
And the things I truly fear
Are to lose the ones that I hold dear
So please forgive me if I repress
All the things I should express
Lost and alone and trying to deal
With the hurricane of emotions that I feel
Should I fight? Should I choose?
To fight a battle I know I'd lose?
Though to my unending shame
All I want is to end the pain
So I can't give up no matter what the cost.
Even trying to win a battle lost
With my heart and so much at stake
I cannot bend but am about to break
Too many years inside my head
Withholding words I should have said
To my despair and failing health
I am losing to the dark side of myself
So now you perhaps have a notion
Of why I hide all of my emotion
It's selfish I know but I hope you'll see
I'm protecting you from that darker side of me
So when I look at you and you're looking back
Please don't delve too deep into these pools of black.
