Here I lay,
Trying to sleep.
Thoughts of you
Make me weep.
I think about us
Now and then,
What we had,
What could have been.
But then you left,
I cried for you;
Now, I'm done.
Now I'm through.
I'm sick of crying
Useless tears,
Over what we had
For about three years.
I've tried to forget,
I've so tried to let go,
But it gets harder each day
As my stomach will grow.
And this baby inside me is a constant reminder, Of what we had, what a total gear grinder!
And to know that this child given from above, Was never conceived out of honest true love,
Is the most miserable thing to ever meet,
That this child will be born
Out of one night of heat.
While you were out having
A wonderfully good time,
I was at home,
Dumb to your crime.
Well, I got the best of you,
So I can't regret too much.
I know I will be happy
When I feel that baby's touch.
But you will go your life,
Knowing what you could have had,
When you think of me,
I know you will be sad.
Because you had your chance,
With me and with your child,
That baby will make my pain over you
Totally worth the while.
I tell myself this,
To be happy, and glad.
That when I think of you,
I wont get mad.
And yet, here I lay,
Trying to sleep.
I turn to my pillow,
And silently weep.
**I sent this poem to the League of American Poets. They want to publish it in a poetry book so I thought I'd put it on here as well. Tell me what you think. :)**
