On The Length of Time

Nothing seems to make me worthwhile
and nothing can replace
the tears ive already shed
no more tears will fall
even though my tired mind
wills them to fall
wanting to leave this place,
so murky of soundless waves
that pound onto the earth,
as i lay here all alone,
i am pondering on the length of time,
the shapeless forms floating in my mind,
and the dizziness of this reality
is screaming at me to wake up
from this nightmare
that controls these unruly thoughts
of suicide
lie to me
and ill lie inside forever
and all ill miss
wont make any difference
to me
any longer
the raindrops begin to fall,
one by one
until the end of time,
and i cant hold on
anymore
love has failed me
life has turned me inside out,
so you can see my every thought
trembling down my spine
and i know,
i am no longer my own
willing myself to move,
i follow time,
hoping ill live to see tommorrow,
so for now,
ill be alone,
lying facedown,
in this life of lies
until i will myself
to end the pain
and the never-ending strain
of weakness,
so until then,
ill lie here
and wait
for suicide.