Comments : Whispers in the wind

  • 17 years ago

    by BlueEyedMystery

    Wow I loved this poem.. I really liked the title too. The flow was good. I liked the rhyme scheme in it; it was alittle different, which is always good.

    "taking all of a familey and kin"
    familey needs to be family

    "breaking familey's apart"
    familey's is families

    This was very good! Keep up the great work!

    Keep writing!
    Cayce

  • Jason,
    I love this poem to i can relate to it i think thats why i like it so much it is written well keep up the good work

  • 17 years ago

    by Alesia

    This is an outstanding poem! I love the fact that it's saying how the simplest lie can do so much damage. Another great piece of work, Jason!

  • 17 years ago

    by David

    Whoa. i voted. def 5. this poem was dark. very. loved it, somehow. mysteriously.

    5/5 David

  • 17 years ago

    by supaflyhonkyguy

    Hauntingly beautiful dude, especially the last stanza, i swear i could almost feel the wind blowing while i was reading this. very nice, definate 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Momentary Relapse

    ...Ooo, like how it has 'whispers in the wind' on both the first lines and the final line. It wasn't exactly something I like but I enjoyed it nonetheless. There is a part in the second stanza where the rhyming seems forced. A slight flow prob on the last stanza but can be overlooked. It's different which is a good thing.
    ~Faith-less