Once upon a time,
I thought what i felt was normal,
Beginning to cry, wanting to die,
Feeding off a cesspool of negativity,
Never looking up, always looking down,
Never feeling up, always feeling down,
I used to question, why it was how i was,
And i came to the conclusion,
It's not how I'm meant to be.
In a past, not long ago,
People made impressions, affected my thinking,
Although short lived, their kindness made a dent,
Tried to force it's way through,
The shell of a downward spiral,
But every now and then, a bad apple i would pick,
And my trust of humankind joins the spiral,
The cycle continues,
It's not how I'm meant to be.
In a future, not far away,
I see nothing,
Nothing to live for, nothing to gain,
People say live for love!
But I've experienced this so called "love",
Wasn't worth the effort,
I hate being pessimistic, in a way I'm a realist,
Maybe I haven't found the "one"
It's not how I'm meant to be.
