My beginning

Wake up from a short night sleep

and wonder why god has given me my life to keep

I roll back over on my old, stained bed

And think way too many thoughts in my head

"Why am I still here? Why am I alive?

Why can't God kill me, Why can't I die?"

My alarm goes off, its time to move

Time to face the world, so much to prove.

I get up and wash my face

Then look at myself, I'm such a disgrace.

I'm a seventeen year old, ugly girl

I shouldn't be here, not good enough for the world.

I put on my clothes and grab my bag

As I head out the door, I hear people gag.

I put on my mask and force you to believe

That I am happy, just look at me and see.

Everyday I fake this, for seven hours

Sometimes I wish I had super powers.

I sit there and stare at the clock, waiting for the bell

"ding dong, ding dong" tells me I can go back to my hell.

I head home on my two feet

Halfway there is where we meet

Pretty blues eyes is what you had

But then I realized you were completely bad.

You handed me, an innocent child,

A sharp object to make me wild.

Then a small but pretty gun

A note attached saying "lets have fun"

I got home and I sat down

My face glistening with a frown.

Around about eight that night

I made a decision that would change my life.

I grabbed the gun and the blade

I made a slice and there I laid

On the hard but cold ground

Blood flooding all around

My moments are drawing to a near

I write my note and just lay it there

Twenty long minutes finally passed

Something came over me and I just laughed.

I grabbed the gun in my hand

Hoping when I pushed the trigger, I make a land

At around exactly nine

I put everything back into line

I stood up and turned on my song

"Welcome to My Life" on repeat, it wont be too long

I blare the song really, really loud

In time ill sing it on a cloud.

I put the gun in my mouth and I counted to three

Then pulled the trigger in side of me.

I'm now dead at exactly 9:35

September 5, 2007 is the day I began my life.