Remembering us all together sharing the pain of blades and pills and people who didn't understand.
people who said things that hurt
so the hurt came out on us, passive, aggressive
hating ourselves
loving
and loving each other
and "I'll be here for you"
won't get mad when you bleed for yourself
because i do it too.
became an interest, a hobby, a drug
an addiction
pain is good
pain is ecstasy
pain is real
we have things in common i share with you over 30 miles the pain of blades in my skin.
the pain of slashes and scabs and scars
as trophies to show that I'm tough
as memories you wish you could forget
as canvases and symbolic wounds
as pale paper white
arms and legs
crossed with red and black
knives and glass
box cutters scalpels
you could say "what were we thinking"
you could regret
i think we grew that year
i think we realized some things
i think we're still not done but we've been through a lot
when a lot means nothing and nothing means normal change that is not at all unique
I've realized who i can trust and i look back at the people who've been there through it all and all i can do is smile and imagine them a hug as i am forced to turn around and pick up a pen to face the sunrise because tomorrow has become tomorrow again and the cliche of the 'new day' has fallen on the planet and i can feel my heart melt as i close my eyes
thank you
i love you
and I'll never leave your side
