Relatively, it's been a short while since I first met her.
Soon she would be making me feel happier and happier still.
It's always easiest to point at some of the obvious reasons of what is happening to me.
Whether it is our intense discussions, frequent visits, my lack of a social life, being pretty much the same age, and sharing some things in common.
Sure I do believe that this was once true, but I pretty positive that's not accurate anymore.
In the first stages of our relationship, I was unsure, uncomfortable, and didn't notice much of anything, although I was still aware of her beauty.
Now I feel the relationship has advanced through all of that, becoming more intense.
I opened up to her and learned to trust her.
I began to respect her highly because of the decisions she has made in her life, and how she handles life now.
There is no doubt in my mind, that she has had the largest positive impact on my life.
I don't know when it happened, but it did happen.
I fell in love with her.
This is the first time I have felt so strongly about anyone.
I am sure that I will never be able to open up to anybody else like I do to her.
Nor will I feel these intense feelings with anyone else.
Thirty three years of living this life of mine and I believe this will not happen to me again.
It hurts sometimes, by not being able to tell her some things.
I am forced to love her secretly, distantly.
Stuffing all these feelings, and pretending not to love her.
I want to be with her all of the time; she always makes me feel so alive.
There is, almost, no better feeling, than seeing her face light up after reading something I wrote about her, for her.
Writing these poems, of the love I have for her, helps keep me from bursting.
It's the one way of expressing my love to her, without saying it out loud.
Our hugs are wonderful.
Nobody has hugged me in the way she does.
I will never tire of the feeling of her arms wrapped around me, her hands on my back slightly pulling me into her.
I automatically close my eyes, I think I am just trying to take in every moment.
Feeling her hair on my face, her arms holding me, I just wish she would hug me as tightly as she possibly could.
There is a void in my life, it's to be loved, but only by her.
There are some times that I wonder how her soft lips would feel on mine.
Unfortunately, the thoughts get blotted out with negativity, almost instantly.
Shortly after, I hide in my room and begin to sob heavily, into my pillow.
Hoping no one can hear me, but it's always so hard to keep quiet.
If someone heard me and asked me why I was so miserable, I wouldn't be able to tell them the truth.
Once in a while, I think how wonderful life would be if the three of us became a family.
Where we all contribute to one another by sharing things, doing things together, supporting each other, helping out whomever needs helping, and of course, loving each other.
When we are "no more", I hope she will think of me, at least for a short while.
As for me, I will never forget her.
She reminds me of a ravishing legendary woman.
She was Queen Nefertiti, of Ancient Egypt.
Her name roughly translates to "the beautiful (or perfect) woman has come)â€.
Together they are the most exquisite women the world has ever known.
Both of them have an alluring beauty that will never fade with time.
