Two faced thoughts

It's not changed much,
It still shouts far.
The pain, the gain,
My shooting star.

Sleepless nights,
Don't help the cause.
They feed the flames,
No room for pause.

Your face still lingers,
Its presence is strong.
On some dreary nights,
For you I long.

Yet there are times,
When your face is vile.
It haunts me through,
For a long, long while.

You take my dreams,
And crush what's true.
You make me sick,
By what you do.

You broke me down,
You shattered my sun.
You made me pure,
You weren't the one.