Autumn.

by Miu   Mar 23, 2007


Cold autumn wind flew through me.
And I fall down on my knees.
And theres a puddle in front of me
I cant see my reflection, can't see my face,
Only emotions you made me fake.
My heart died, you let me fall.
Where our love has gone?
And I see the leaf dropping from autumn sky.
like the tears dropping from my eyes.
I won't be happy again,
Not till the rock on grave, saying my name.

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by ali

    This is really good, what a sad ending though!!! it flowed really well and i thought it was really good!! :D
    5/5
    - ali xxx

  • 17 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    Try and capatilise your I's...

    I thought this was okay but found there were alot of fillers in this *(I, you, and, etc) Try eliminating some of those to make the flow go better.
    The other thing I noticed was that you used the word 'me' alot, it distracted me from the overall poem.

    Apart from that, I liked this, it was beautiful yet sad at the same time.

  • 17 years ago

    by Marc Ortiz

    Good poem, flow was good! well done! I like your style in writing! you're really talented! I enjoyed all 6 of your poems :) keep writing! and thanks for the comments! TC

  • 17 years ago

    by xxSnow Angelxx

    A great poem...short yet well penned!....save a few puntuations i did'nt find errors in the poem as such!...Good imagery!!..Nice job!
    Kp it up!!again a 5/5!
    xxPoojaxx

  • 17 years ago

    by Vanessa

    The imagery was really good once again, and the emtions were strong enough that I could feel them. You did a great job, writting this. 5/5

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