Excellent wording and structure. good poem, you have a good talent here so keep writing. take kare xxxxx

Creative emotive and extraordinarily powerful. This well structured poem says it all. The imagery is a masterpiece. Thankyou for sharing this brilliant work. It made me not just see but to feel. Well done 5/5 plus

Very good. I understand. U are good. Keep up the good work.
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And thanks for commenting mine. U imaged what I want people to image. Hope u read my other poems. And see wha u think.
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U're good! Keep it up!

Very powerful wording and the theme is extremely sad =( 5/5 I think its very good!

OoOoO!!! I love the imagery it was just wonderful! And the wording was just so powerful I couldn't actually believe anyone could have came up with that haha! This poem was very well structured and written nice job!

Wow..i think this should b better in dark...good poem...very dark...

Not what I was expecting from the title, but in the end I believe you used the analogy very well. You can really feel every word and in the end, you are that girl and that is what makes it a good poem. 5/5

He�s ready.
[[He's]]

Words as sour
As his breath,
Strike her.
[[I like that desciption.]]

And I love that ending. I wasn't too interested, but interested enough to keep reading and that ending is a kicker; it's perfect.

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex 5.5