Loosing grip

I'm numb when I talk to you,
and numb when i don't,
and my heart tells me i will,
when my head says i won't.
with so many contradictions,
the truth is hard to find,
sometimes I simply wish,
you could see inside my mind,
so many disasters remaining untold,
watch as my sanity looses its hold,
my grip on reality is no longer the same,

I'm loosing grip,
but you don't seem to care,
where are you?
are you even aware?
my grasp on life is slipping away,
who knows whether,
I'll last the day?