Depression is not a flaw within me,
It's something you're too oblivious to even see,
You assume this smile on my face,
Means i'm content in my place,
Little do you know my smile is not reality,
My happiness at this point is not even a possibility,
I wish i could control where my life was going,
It seems to stressful, dull, and boring,
Most people are old in age, young at heart,
I feel the opposite, like my age and body are two entities far apart,
My age so young, my mind so old,
My heart so warm, my body so cold,
I share all my love with anyone who may come my way,
But i realize this is an evil, cruel world more and more every day,
How can you love me for who i am,
If i don't even give a damn,
Why would i believe you'd care about someone so gloom,
Like a dead flower who never even wanted to bloom,
I think my life is all just an act,
The way i feel, the way i think, nothing is any longer a fact,
Suicide sometimes feels like my only way out,
But then i picture the faces of my family and friends, and that casts doubt,
Putting an end to my life would end also another,
And regardless of this misery, I can't end the joy of my father and mother,
I just wish there was a purpose behind all this pain,
Like there was a good in all this, a greater gain,
I want to see the light at the end of this long, tiring road,
One day i'll wake up and all this resentment to life will just corrode,
...Oh who am i kidding, certainly not me,
I have to accept my happiness will never be,
Just live this journey until it finally comes to an end,
This friendship with myself will never mend,
Just leave me alone to forever sulk and frown,
In my miseries i just hope to drown!
