A Simple Dare

by Hollymariee   Apr 1, 2007


**ABOUT THIS POEM: My best friend and I were super close, well we were kinda more than friends, but we just ignored it because of my dad and what everyone else would say. I told him I loved him, and he told me he loved me too. Three days after our eigth grade graduation he kissed another girl, and I was so heartbroken. He thought it was OK because we weren't officially going out... But he knew we we're more than just friends. It would mean ALOT to me if you commented or voted... thanks.**

3 Seconds to say I love you,
3 hours to explain.
Even though I can not help it,
I find myself to blame.

I told you that I loved you,
I gave you my whole heart.
But before I seen it coming,
You tore my world apart.

Now I find myself,
On the ground,
With a shattered heart,
As the tears roll down;

From my cheeks,
Onto these pages.
What just happened,
I can not change it.

What's done is done,
But it can't be true.
You couldn't have,
I'm in love with you.

She was just some girl,
A simple dare.
But I love you babe,
And you know I care.

Why am I so hurt?
You were never mine.
But even still,
I can't help but cry.

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Latest Comments

  • 14 years ago

    by Stephanie Naylor

    I thought that overall the poem was really good and it was your own life experience and i love that you could share it with us in such a poetic way. The rhyming was good throughout the entire peice, and the flow was spot on in most of it.

    "Now I find myself,
    On the ground,
    With a shattered heart,
    As the tears roll down;"

    ^^ i do not feel that this flows very well,
    you could probably place your commas in different places so it will flow bettre.

    Overall a good read and a well deserved 5/5

  • 15 years ago

    by Aveena

    I agree with everyone elese...it was just great. Very emotinal I liked the last two stanza 's

  • 16 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    Oh no. I can only imagine what this could have been line.. I bet it really tore your heart to shreads.. Very sad write.. and this does happen sometimes.. and it shouldn't.. but I guess you just have to express those feelings more cleary to that person so that they know that you love them. Getting close to someone and basically falling for them and then having your heart broken is completely heartwrenching... I can only imagine the pain you went through knowing he kissed another girl. But, hey.. Life goes on! :]

    5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by SH3S fiNAllY H3R3 l0V3 U N3NA

    This is a really good poem, and it expressed the feeling right. The stanza I really liked was the first one and the second one. But, after that, the flow left the poem. It was good though. Good job.

    .:CiiNDY:.

  • 16 years ago

    by vintage darling

    Everyone can relate to this poem.
    it is so full of feeling and i enjoyed it very much.

    keep writing, you're very talented.

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