Wow, great write, I loved the choice of words. The flow as well as the structure was good. I liked your rhyming scheme as well great Job.

Peace, Joe

Wow. It was interesting how at the end you turned to make it about you.

"She's crude without conscious,
Guilt she does not feel,
She'd hurt a soul without regret,
And a vengeance that's unreal. "

^^ I really loved those lines, something about them called out to me, I don't know what.

Great hob!

5/5 (:

Wonderful.
the best part is all the descriptive words and such. and the end...you first talk about this girl, then you see that this girl is you :)
yay! 5 thumbs up!

Ok.

You have a nice vocabulary, it seems. Praise.

You can rhyme [or I think that's what you were trying to do,] but it doesn't flow. I'm not sure why.

And, it's slightly cliche talking about the devil taking her soul and all.

xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex 5.5

Wow you did such a great job on writing this poem. it's sad but amazing. you really have talented. the flow was good. 5/5

~Kristina