A poem he'd never get to read

I tried to find a word describing my feelings for him
Was is a silly crush, an addiction, love, lust, or simply an obsession
I looked in every dictionary and every thesaurus I owned
But I never found the perfect word for my emotions
For words cannot illustrate these feelings I experience when I see him walk by

I struggle to open an innocent conversation with him
It is because every time I see him I forget how to breathe,
My heart is slamming against my ribs,
And my mind is racing for I cannot think of anything to say
But the thing is I memorized my lines and now I have forgotten them

He has this smile that could break a girl's heart
Eyes that I could get lost in and never find my way out
He has this hair that I wish I could run my fingers through
Lips that make me want to kiss him senseless
He is the only one that could make me feel this way

I was not supposed to fall for him
But the thing is I fell harder for him than anyone I ever fell for
I fell helplessly, hopelessly, desperately, head over heals in love with him
There is something about that smile of his that made my heart skip a beat
And something about those hazel eyes of his that took my breath away

So now I am crazy (head over heals) in love
It is just that he does not feel for me what I feel for him
And he does not love me the way I love him
So now I am stuck in this marry-go-round called love
And I cannot bring my self to head to the exist door

Dedicate to my crush..