Wow. this is a very deep poem. It has a great flow though. It tells a very sad story but is very descriptive and easy to imagine. Excellent write!! *hugs* remember if you need anything I'm here :) 5/5

Wow so imaginaton and wonderful wording
I really liked this one
The floow is not forced and the rhythm keeps you going
Good job
Your sincere friend
LauRa

Wow, thats wonderful! It so deep and the flow is great! Keep up the great work!!! :D
Sky

Wat a great poem. again a 5/5 from me.

from your friend. david

Whoa . I loved how you ended it . At some parts I was likeee "What ??" but I really liked it . It was good . It had its emotion, and was deep . Well done .
..__MiNDYY

Wow.. it was very deep! another great poem! :) 5/5!

You always do well in your ideas for a poem, they are so different i dont know how you come up with all oyur ieas lol.

xxx alex xxx

Ending is very effective and whole piece holds a lot emotions, I enjoy in it. The wording is simple but you still created great atmosphere. 5/5